Growing up one of my biggest challenges in life was my own insecurity. I haven't always been comfortable with the decisions I've made, the way I've reacted to things, or certain aspects of my personality in general. The phrase, older and wiser, has always been a dream, something I've coveted desperately. I pictured growing older as certain skills losing their arduousness. I wanted to magically be better at all the things women are supposed to be talented at.
That hasn't happened. Picking up after myself is still a chore. My house does not have an organizational system. I have to find creative ways to keep me in the Word. I forget to pack lunches, show up way too early or way to late to everything, or just forget where I'm supposed to be entirely.
However, there has been one thing that has been a surprising change! As the years go by, I find myself to be way more comfortable in my own skin. Not to say 27 is old, but as I grow older I'm realizing how at peace I can be with who I am and with who I used to be. I feel more settled, more grounded. I'm not second guessing all of my relationships as much. My mind is focused way more on others than myself. Which, if I'm not devoting head space to myself, it starves my insecurities. This year more than ever has helped expedite this process of settling in. It's caused me to relook at my values and what I find most important. I've not only grown with peace in the decisions I make, but also the decisions I've made throughout my life.
“The great thing about getting older is that you don't lose all the other ages you've been.” —Madeleine L'Engle
When I sat down to paint a new collection of minis, they poured out of me easily. They were a love and not a task. The amenity I feel now as a person transfers into who I am as an artist. I painted each stroke with a new confidence. Each piece took on its own personality freely and readily. How beautiful the revelation of wisdom comes with age. And at 27, I know that there's only room to keep growing. I want to embrace it, humble myself, and keep learning. These paintings are an ode to age, specifically the age of women as we grow, learn, and settle in to ourselves.
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